Abstract
Most of us can readily recall an incident in the not too distant past in which an acquaintance droned on and on about every misfortune that had befallen him or her that day. This person seemed to expect us to react supportively and empathically and to feel privileged that he or she had selected us as a listener. However, each time that we offered advice for how to deal with the problem, we were readily dismissed with “Yes, but....” As the listener in this scenario, we are quick to label this person a complainer and often make every effort to avoid subsequent interactions with him or her.
Whenever you are tempted to tell your troubles to other people, remember that half your listeners aren’t really interested and the rest are glad that you’re finally getting what’s coming to you. Baughman, 1959
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Kowalski, R.M., Erickson, J.R. (1997). Complaining. In: Kowalski, R.M. (eds) Aversive Interpersonal Behaviors. The Springer Series in Social/Clinical Psychology. Springer, Boston, MA. https://doi.org/10.1007/978-1-4757-9354-3_5
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DOI: https://doi.org/10.1007/978-1-4757-9354-3_5
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