The Search for Meaning

Abstract

Few fail to appreciate the more obvious psychological challenges facing the parents of medically fragile infants. Any parent can imagine a mother’s distress at giving birth to a premature baby, her anxiety in helplessly watching the baby struggle to survive on an intensive care unit, or her frustration in trying unsuccessfully to feed or calm her baby. Less apparent to observers is the psychological toll of feeling “victimized” by the birth and care of a medically fragile infant. Taylor, Wood, and Lichtman (1983) define a victim as “one who is harmed by or made to suffer from an act, circumstances, agency, or condition.” Stripped of its adverse connotation, this definition of victimization applies to most individuals who encounter negative life events. But the very status of being a victim is neither socially nor psychologically neutral in our culture. Many undesirable social and personal consequences, beyond the obvious losses associated with the event, ensue from the experience of victimization. Negative personal consequences include the loss of control and threats to self-esteem. Negative social consequences include being blamed by others for the event, feeling stigmatized because of it, and being pitied for it.